MEAT

To market to market to buy a fat pig.......except they aren't really fat! I am going to assume the are headed in the direction of slaughter? Pork seems to be the number one meat of choice here in China. If you are unsure what kind of meat it is, it is probably pork. NO it's not cat to all you comedians out there. Okay well it might be, but I doubt it. I see way too many cats wandering around for it to be cat.  However ,I have been told by some Chinese that dog is still eaten in some parts of China. These dogs are not off the street or taken from some ones back yard. They are farmed for the purpose of eating, I have also heard the same of rats and pigeons. Now I will never know the the real truth to this, I don't eat alot of meat here in China.......but what I have had has been good......so if it's dog, cat or rat.....it's pretty damn tasty!

Strawberries in Winter?

These are hands down the BEST strawberries I have ever eaten in my life! I saw these berries in the supermarket around Christmas, and like at home I passed them over thinking they look good but they will taste terrible. Let me tell you once I had my first one, I was hooked. We feasted on berries for days. They are the perfect size, texture, and taste! No need to sprinkle sugar on these babies, they taste like the sugar has been injected inside!
Next year when I see them come out, I will definitely  be pigging out!

I only came for meatballs

So Jaana....... (you are going to hear this name alot for the next few months) Tells me she will teach me how to make Finnish meatballs. The question then had to be asked.......Are Finnish meatballs better than Swedish meatballs? Ha Ha. I have no idea why she didn't find that funny!

Anyway, Jaana just lives in the building next to me. So off I went with my ground beef so we could start our very own little meatball factory. Meatballs turned into chocolate cake and Finnish bread......and 4 Rolaids before bed that night! So after we had finished making the meatballs Jaana's  Ayi ( this is the Chinese word for maid, actually translated it says Auntie, pronounced  I-E) starts to massage me and she does this really crazy thing with my hand and it feels like she is pulling a thread from inside my body,  through the palm of my hand. Very strange sensation! Next thing you know the Ayi asks if I want a massage, well sure why not!

In the bedroom we go and she starts taking off her pants???? well she has on long johns, then she tells me to take off my pants......and yes this is starting to sound like a boom chicka wah wah  movie......and I was starting to worry it was going to be.  I only came for meatballs! So I say, well...... I might have a hole in my under ware....... and I know she will massage  my  inner thigh.....they always do, and I can't remember when the last time I weed whacked the bikini line......she will think I am some kind of animal. So she offers me a pair of lounging pants that belong to Jaana's husband. The poor man has never met me and I am wearing his clothes. The Ayi tells me to lie on my stomach, she jumps on my back, whips up my shirt and undoes my bra...... I only came for meatballs!!!!

The massage was very good, except when she massaged my inner thigh.  I was a bit squeamish ( it hurts in that spot of virgin skin that doesn't normally get pinched) she told me it hurt because I was too big there! If my legs were small like hers and I was strong like her it wouldn't hurt! One day Jaana had been hiking in the mountains and came home for lunch to make herself some salad. She added some feta cheese to her salad, and the Ayi told her that is the why foreigners are fat.......because we eat cheese! lol. Ya gotta love the honesty!

So after all that ,I found out the Ayi used to massage and do cupping for a living and was also a cook. So she now has another job at my house 2 days a week,  teaching me to cook, cleaning and hopefully giving me a massage! Imagine........  I ONLY WENT FOR MEATBALLS!!!!

Cupping

Ok so I have been reading alot about cupping and decided it was something I wanted to try. But push came to shove and I chickened out when asked if I wanted to do it...... I needed time to syke myself up.
So yesterday afternoon my new side kick Jaana (who is from Finland) Fins are better than Swedes by the way! Kinda like the Canadians are better than Americans.....Ha Ha......no really we think that! Ok not to piss off every American friend I have, SOME Americans.......never mind I just dug myself a hole I can't get out of!

Jaana called me yesterday and said lets go for a massage. After my first massage that left me unable to sleep on my back for 2 days, I was a bit nervous. But as Jaana would say "stop being a wussy". So off we went. They gave us a small dark room with 2 beds and a pair of damp ugly insane asylum P.J's. As you can see in the photo they are super sexy. Last massage we had 2 girls.....and they were powerful little things that left me feeling like a beaten dog. So imagine how I felt seeing 2 guys come in, and not "hot" guys either. I wish I could describe the smell that was radiating off these boys......wait I will do my best. Garlic, cigarettes , rotten breath, clammy hands and well that smell of ....I don't know dirty bum? Anyway when I had to roll on to my stomach it was no better, my  face was in the little hole and he was sitting by head, so all I could smell was feet.....dirty I have been wearing my socks for 8months smell. I was closing my eyes trying to visualize Ricky Marten ........ I mean Deane, massaging me. I would prefer the girl on girl action! ( calm down boys) when I am being massaged in my inner thigh I would prefer the girl being that close to my "cookie" not the stinky dirty boy.......not relaxing for me!

So after the 90 min fairly rough massage, I mean I like it a little rough but this was a little hardcore for me, One of the stinky boys brings in a tray of cups.......and the cupping begins! So instead of doing me first I had the pleasure to watch him do Jaana first.........this story is starting to sound like a boom chicka wah wah movie. I can assure you it was not! Watching him with the flame and the cups and the way her skin looked red and sucked up in the cup , I was secretly freaking out. Ok it was no secret, the only thing that kept me strong were the wonderful supportive words my dear friend Jaana kept saying to me "Stop being a wussy" Those were the words she kept saying as my back felt as though someone was tearing off my skin!

In all seriousness now he (stinky boy) flamed the mouth of the cup and applied it quickly to my back and then pulled it off and re applied it to a different spot. He did this a few times before he fixed it in one spot. Finally he applies the first one, the best way to describe the feeling is like an Indian rubber burn. It is a feeling of terrible discomfort, but not pain. After 3 or 4 minutes you go numb, after having the cups on for about 15mins stinky boy starts to remove them one by one. It feels like band aids being ripped off.....like the ones that were around when we where kids.....the ones that stuck to you like duct tape. Do they even still sells those anymore?

After removing the cups, stinky rubs your back really hard with oil. It doesn't feel real pleasant but I guess it's necessary. And in the end you are left with these beautiful "hickey's". I apologize for the white pastie, flabby love handles. I would not normally post pictures of myself like that, but hey it was in the name of research!

P.S. cupping is said to be good for pulling toxins the surface so you can get rid of them easier. It is good for back pain, blood circulation, colds and congestion. You can google cupping and see what it says. In China the cost is 8$ a session!

The Grandma's

Ahhhhh The Grandma's.......this is one of our favorite restaurants. This is a chain, all over Hangzhou

      This is a cabbage dish. If you could taste this, the flavour would shock you and you would probably eat cabbage every day!

    This is the same as the cabbage......bursting with flavours! It makes loving vegetables easy!

   Green veggies, a bit crunchy,  great broth and tofu.....yep I said it! 
   TOFU. Turn your nose up if you like, but the Chinese know how 
    to cook with tofu. We in the western world have no idea. All we 
    know is how to make it taste like shit! Speaking of shit.....and 
    food in the same sentence, yum! There is a Tofu here that we 
    refer to as "shit tofu" because if you are in a restaurant and smell
   it ...ummmm WOW....smells like, you drank to much the night 
   before shit! No joke, I thought my son was going to barf at the 
   dinner table. I have a fairly strong stomach, but this smell makes 
   it almost impossible to eat!(not the tofu, but any food)
   In fact restaurants are talking about banning it. On one menu it's  
   English translation said poo tofu. 
   Need I say more? It is fermented tofu. Why the heck would you              eat something that smells like someone just hung a big dump on your plate?.............Oh China! :)

     And the fish...pan fried perch. Yes the head is still on it!   Get over it ......we don't eat the head. 
However the Chinese believe the cheek is the best meat and they leave it for their guests. The  women believe it is good for the complexion.